Time flies so fast and today was Ethan’s first day of school. After 3 years and 8 months, he’s now an official schoolboy, whether I like it or not he’s no longer a baby. How I wish I could stop the time so he will always be my baby but I know I can’t and I just have to accept the fact that time has come that I have to let him go. I have to allow him to spread his wings and fly, see the world, meet new people, learn new skills and discover things on his own.
It was a bittersweet memory, I’m sad because I know that he will have new friends when we used to be his only friend (me and hubby) #jealous. I know that he will be more independent when he used to ask for my help with everything #feellessneeded. I’m scared because I won’t be able to see him for 2 hours and 30 minutes, I can’t be there to defend him from bully kids and I can’t be there to comfort him. #paranoidmom. Maybe this is the reason why I’m not yet ready for school because I’m not yet ready for this moment.
But despite my drama moments, I’m still happy and excited for him, this is now a new chapter in his life and I’m just here to support and guide him. No matter what happens, I will always be proud of him and I will be here and there all the time. Even though he’s no longer a baby, he will always be my baby.
First Day of School
He started school this morning,
And he seemed so very small.
As I walked there beside him
In the Kindergarten hall.
And as he took his place beside
the others in the class,
I realized how all too soon
Those first few years can pass.
Remembering, I saw him as
He first learned how to walk.
The words that we alone made out
When he began to talk.
This little boy so much absorbed
In learning how to write.
It seems as though he must have grown
To boyhood overnight.
My eyes were blurred by hastily
I brushed the tears away
Lest by some word or sign of mine
I mar his first big day.
Oh how I longed to stay with him
And keep him by the hand
To lead him through the places
That he couldn’t understand.
And something closely kin to fear
Was mingled with my pride.
I knew he would no longer be
A baby by my side.
But he must have his chance to live,
To work his problems out,
The privilege to grow and learn
What life is all about?
And I must share my little boy
With friends and work and play;
He’s not a baby anymore –
He’s in Kindergarten today
I've read this poem here, I just edited she, her, little girl etc.